There are few experiences in an individual’s life more inherently stressful and worrisome than a divorce. Perhaps never is a person more vulnerable to losing not only a spouse, but also one’s children, home, and assets. While your fears may never be totally alleviated, one of the best mechanisms for reducing these inherent risks is a good working relationship with your attorney. Whether you are simply considering a divorce or have already begun the process, the following tips will help you and your attorney identify your goals and achieve the most favorable outcome.

First and foremost, communication is always key. No matter how highly recommended attorneys may come, they are only as good as the information they have. This means finding an individual with whom you feel comfortable talking to about sensitive matters. If there are aspects of your marriage that you think may hurt your case, your attorney needs to know about them sooner rather than later. The quicker he or she knows, the quicker the two of you can craft a strategy to protect your interests.

Second, make yourself as available as possible. Whether that means saving your attorney in your phone contacts, checking your e-mails regularly, or scheduling regular check-ins, you need to designate at least one way to be reached quickly and efficiently at all times. It is in your best interest to deal with potential problems as they appear, and that cannot happen unless your attorney knows how to get a hold of you.  When dealing with filing deadlines and hearing schedules, even the simplest of divorces can be complicated by ineffective correspondence.

Third and lastly, keep an open mind. When approached with compromise or settlement offers, always be willing to hear and consider them. Too often creative solutions get passed up without adequate consideration. Consider the case of the two women fighting over a fresh orange. One needs the zesty rind to flavor a cake she is making, while the other wants to squeeze the fresh juice from the sweet pulp. The obvious solution is to peel the orange and give both parties the part of the fruit they desire. Too often in divorces, however, the metaphorical orange is simply split down the middle, leaving both parties with less than what they wanted. By having an open mind and seeking creative solutions, parties can often solve problems more amicably.

Effective communication, availability, and open-mindedness will better allow your attorney to successfully advocate on your behalf. While this list is far from all-inclusive, remembering these simple tips will help minimize stress and support a favorable outcome for your divorce case.

Matthew McDonough, Associate Attorney

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